Headed to an SEC game this weekend? You’ve probably heard about one blogger who wants the young ladies of the SEC to “leave the club clothes at home.” Her controversial post has been taken down but, alas, those screen shots live on. I’ve seen tons of reactions to her essay ranging from frothing rage against bullying and body shaming (which, admittedly, is the camp I’m in) to a few women waving spirit fingers in agreement. Morgan weighs in with her thoughts in what I think is a very respectful and sincere response.
Dear Rebecca W.,
As a University of Alabama student myself, currently enrolled in my freshman year, I am saddened and angered by your post. Like you said, it was twenty years ago when you were enrolled here. Times change, and so does fashion. Nowadays, most young ladies of the SEC aren’t trying to look cute for frat guys. Yes, that can be an added bonus, but a lot of us just like to look cute. So sorry that when you went here no one told you that you didn’t have to dress up for a boy. And last time I checked, girls don’t actually show up to games in bikinis or bras and underwear, so no one was telling Victoria’s secret.
But my question to you is, so what? So what if I or any other girl wants to wear stilettos to a game? If we can rock them, why not? Also there are all type of bras nowadays that are actually MEANT to peek out of tops, such as bralettes. (Check Victoria’s Secret for them.)
I’m very shocked that you would say that we young ladies of the SEC were under the “misguided notion that you looked irresistible” because that’s just rude. If I spent an hour trying to get ready and look cute, FOR MYSELF, then hell yeah, I’m probably going to tell myself that I look good, because I do. And no, my mother probably doesn’t know what I’m wearing. This is college – a place that encourages independent thinking. Young people today get enough criticism for not being self-sufficient or autonomous. And yet, you want mom to keep picking out our clothes for us? That helicopter needs to land some time.
And don’t even get me started on this line: “I wanted to tell you if you’re doing this for a boy, he’s not the one for you.” So I shouldn’t dress for a guy (though you said that you and your friends would try and look your best “for those fraternity guys”), but at the same time I should dress for the ones who like properly covered-up girls in a sensible shoes? No thanks.
Hey, I get that you may have a different taste in clothes, and that’s fine because I would never shame you for what you wear, but that doesn’t make what we choose to wear, “tasteless.” And as someone with curves, I’m disgusted that you would say “those ill-covered curves you’ve made sure are on full display.” I really hope you didn’t mean that to be as fat shaming as it sounds. (As you say, little eyes are watching.) If I want to flaunt my curves, I’m going to. Not for a boy but as a sign of confidence, something that hasn’t always come easily for me.
You say you admire individuality and personal style but apparently you mean only on your terms. Well, I admire self-expression as well, and my clothes, makeup and writing reflect that. Speaking of writing, I read other posts on your blog and found them well-written, sincere and honest. I especially liked the post where you were relieved an older man didn’t pass unsolicited judgment on you because your child was messy. The words that resonated with me the most: Be kind to those in your path. We’re all just doing the best we can.
So speaking on behalf of myself and my friends who are young ladies of the SEC, we will be young and carefree, Rebecca, and we will also dress how we want because we can. As you said when you encouraged us to sneak alcohol into the stadium, this is college, right? So come to our games, enjoy the sports and live atmosphere, but please, leave your unsolicited judgments and body shaming at home.
What do you think? Your body, your rules or are you a fan of the “more covered is more classy” argument for? Weigh in below.