As part of our new mini series, Love Lesson from My Exes, we’re sharing what women of all ages have learned about love (and themselves) on the dating scene. Here are Susan’s love lessons so far.
1. Holding a grudge against an ex will only be harmful to you, not to your ex.
2. Good sex is not a good enough reason to stay with someone who is otherwise pretty awful.
3. Possessive behavior is NOT cute. And it’s potentially the beginnings of emotional abuse.
4. If he only calls you in the middle of the night, he’s probably not all that interested in getting to know you as a person.
5. If you have to lie on his behalf–ever–he’s not the one.
6. The absolute best thing you can do for yourself after a breakup is cutting off all contact. Keeping that line open will only hurt.
7. Real love is not about how easy it is. It’s about how hard you’re willing to try when things are not easy. You do have to keep choosing to be together.
8. It’s ok to want your space and your alone time when you’re in a relationship. If a boyfriend doesn’t respect that, let him go.
9. He doesn’t need to have the same dreams as you, but he should still support those dreams and want to hear about them.
10. Take note of how he speaks to/treats his female family members. That will be you he’s talking to that way if you get married/move in together.
11. Talk about money, especially if you’re sharing a bank account.
Oh! And couples therapy is a GOOD thing.
Got any love lessons of your own you’d like to share? We’d love to hear them.
Photo credit: Eric Gray Photography